- Category: Paul Rodenburg
- Published on Wednesday, 03 July 2013 05:01
- Written by Paul Rodenburg
- Hits: 4255
It's horse killing time!!! This past Tuesday the USDA gave a slaughter house in New Mexico a permit to slaughter horses for consumption. Well the horse meat plant is in Roswell, New Mexico, so maybe it's for aliens. Who knows? Maybe Aliens can't get enough of the Horse cock... I mean cock meat... err cock...
But my real question is, where the fuck are they going to get all the horses to slaughter? I am a city boy, the only people I've ever known to have horses are my cousins, who have some on their farm. And a few rich girls I've known. I really don't want to bite into a horse burger, realizing that some inbred rich girl's ass was on it at one time. Hmmm, wait... that's kinda hot... excuse me while I go throw up.... and masturbate... I like to spew out of several orifices at once. It's the only way to puke-gazm. Really, you must try it some time.
"Awww, Princess Buttercup, Daddy says we have to make you into dinner."
"Who wants their Princess Buttercup rare?"
Some animals rights groups are putting their love of horses to the forefront by trying to sue the USDA to prevent the horse slaughtering.
Love always loses to deliciousness.
Imagine having been there when McDonalds started and having had a chance to get in on the ground floor? Well why not do it now, in the horse meat revolution! I can see it now, ads promoting this new delicious meat choice.
And there's a huge opportunity here to offer what McDonalds, and Wendy's can't, with a horse burger restaurant. Why not make it a two in one experience? When you go out for lobster at a fancy place, you can pick the lobster you want, then they cook it. Why not make it a petting zoo/restaurant? Let little Suzy enjoy a ride on her new steed "Flower," then have her learn an important life lesson as she gets to eat "Flower" at the dinner table.
This industry is going to be huge! Don't wait for someone else to strike it big first. You should cash out your life savings right now to be ahead of the trend, and cash in on this upcoming horse meat gold rush. It's a can't miss thing!